Apologies to the handful of you that still try to follow this blog. 2018 was undisputedly (so far) the worst year for me & mine. (It doesn't sound grammatically correct, but I'm declaring that it is so deal with it.)
I'm still recovering from last year & so far this year has been better, but not by a ton. So, this post will be short, ish.
Not prepared to go into details, but let me just say that there were WAY TOO MANY deaths in my family & as we're approaching (or have passed) the one year anniversaries of those losses I'm struggling.
I've been trying to find my way back to myself, back to the people I care about, but it's not easy. Not by a long shot. As always money (or lack thereof) weighs heavy on my mind. Anxiety pounces on everything, even the sadness of a Hallmark movie (because they don't show the commercials like they used to). Stress, depression & fatigue take over; worries fill in the nooks & crannies.
I've not been able to create much; the inner critic monsters have stepped up with megaphones & protest posters, echoing the unknowingly/unintentionally insensitive comments of strangers, family & friends. They've no permits, but because there is no inner positive police force to deal with them, they persist.
But I'm on a tiny ledge of "you can tryness" right now, so I've taken the first step. This post. Which I will not share on Facebook or Twitter. Which I will publish before I change my mind. Which will hopefully be the start to more.
I hope you've been well....
Aloha hugs,
-Clare
I'm still recovering from last year & so far this year has been better, but not by a ton. So, this post will be short, ish.
Not prepared to go into details, but let me just say that there were WAY TOO MANY deaths in my family & as we're approaching (or have passed) the one year anniversaries of those losses I'm struggling.
I've been trying to find my way back to myself, back to the people I care about, but it's not easy. Not by a long shot. As always money (or lack thereof) weighs heavy on my mind. Anxiety pounces on everything, even the sadness of a Hallmark movie (because they don't show the commercials like they used to). Stress, depression & fatigue take over; worries fill in the nooks & crannies.
I've not been able to create much; the inner critic monsters have stepped up with megaphones & protest posters, echoing the unknowingly/unintentionally insensitive comments of strangers, family & friends. They've no permits, but because there is no inner positive police force to deal with them, they persist.
But I'm on a tiny ledge of "you can tryness" right now, so I've taken the first step. This post. Which I will not share on Facebook or Twitter. Which I will publish before I change my mind. Which will hopefully be the start to more.
I hope you've been well....
Aloha hugs,
-Clare
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